I should have turned when I had the chance

*phone call*

Me: Hello?

Tara: I want to kill someone

Me: Oh good, so you're outside?

Tara brought me a fridge today. She claimed she was visiting her father in the hospital and dropped by with a totally awesome fridge (with attached freezer) that had been left behind by someone this summer. I claim the main mission of this trip was to bring me a fridge. She made the rookie error of coming at 3 in the afternoon, otherwise known as Shipley School pick up hell time. I laughed at her misfortune, but I would pay it later.

I had a variety of items that I needed to pick up. Dish soap (my residents have been complaining that we've been without dish soap for 3 weeks....I was of the belief that this stuff just magically appeared), Candy (Thursday is candy day. Things get violent if it's not here), Halloween decorations, socks, a cheap Phillies t-shirt, and freezable items to put in my new freezer. Usually I would go to Target, but I'm starting to realize just how much Target has ripped me off over the past 5 years. Now that I'm 21 and no longer rely on it as my sole entertainment option...I frankly hate it. Everything is priced to make you think you're getting a deal....but you really aren't. What I wanted was a good old American Wal-Mart. Now there you'll find cheap junk, and that's exactly what I needed. For those of you not familiar with the Main Line, it's not exactly a Wal-Mart area. According to the site, the closest one is in King of Prussia. I was skeptical, I've never seen one there, but the internet never lies. Off I went. My day began with a trip down Montgomery Ave at dusk. Earlier in the day this road had been the site of an accident that required not one, but two, medical helicopters. It is not nearly wide enough to have two lanes in each direction, yet people treat it like a highway. There are sudden twists and turns and, my favorite, a giant boulder that juts out across the road at one point. At night time you can't see it until you're right in front of it...terrifying. I made it down to the mall area in one piece. Here I made an executive decision. I knew that the Wal-Mart wouldn't be in the mall area, it's just not classy enough. I take a right and go down the highway, hoping to find Wal-Mart. As people whip in and around me, treating it like a live version of MarioKart. I finally, out of frustration, turn into a shopping center, just hoping that maybe it will be the Wal-Mart one. Nope, just Acme. I continue down the road, note a Marshalls on the other side. I'll have to stop there one the way back. All of a sudden barriers appear in the middle of the road. The buildings disappear. I'm on a highway. ARGH. If I ever wrote a book about driving around here I would name it "I should have turned when I had the chance" that or "BALLS", both are acceptable. If the previous road was MarioKart, this road was MarioKart on speed. Everyone cranks it up a notch and starts flying everywhere. I spot signs of civilization up ahead, if I can only get up there and turn around...wait..ohhhh, no....ohh...AW MAN! I've ended up in Norristown. I don't really know how to describe Norristown, other than not the place to be after dark. On the plus side? Really cheap gas it turns out. I no longer have to drive home to NJ just to get cheap gas! I turn around in the parking lot of a "gentlemens jazz club" (classy? I know) while two guys about my age just stand on the street corner and laugh at me. I'm pretty sure every road leads to Norristown. The amount of times I've accidentally ended up in Norristown over the past few years is astonishing. No matter where I'm going, I always end up here. 

After turning around I (safely) speed back to KOP. As I pass the Marshalls I slam my hand against the steering wheel....I really, really, need more pairs of pants. But I'm so not willing to try and turn around again. I figure that the Wal-Mart must be on the other side of the mall. As I go through the traffic light, someone cuts me off and merges into my lane, forcing me to quickly get over into the other lane. Normally, annoying and dangerous, but fine. Nope, this lane quickly merges off the the right and takes me onto I-76...heading back to Bryn Mawr. You win this round Target....I'm on my way. 

In the end, we have candy, we have dish soap, and I have socks. Minor win? Major loss for my ego.