An Open Letter to Shipley Parents

Dear SUV driving, cell phone yakking, gum chewing caffeine addicts,

Hi. I go to school right next to the school that your kids go to. I live there. The streets that you use as your own personal parking lot? Yea, they lead straight to my dorm. My house if you will. I'd love to be able to get there, but when you take your SUV, which you don't know how to drive and block all roads of access to my school....well that's not exactly possible. Oh, don't worry, most buildings on campus take at least 33 seconds to burn down...so if an emergency vehicle needed to get through, I'm sure they'd wait.

Now I'm sure little Blake and Aiden would much rather you pick them up than take the bus, but sometimes you just need to tell them to toughen up. Taking the bus builds character and will significantly reduce the chance of me committing mass road rage related violence. 

Also, to the three parents who tried to hit me (1 while I was in the car, 2 while I was crossing the street) please don't do that again. Especially since you've blocked all access routes for the ambulances. 

I hate the Main Line. 

DOUBLE POST?!?!?!

I spent my Sunday at the spawning ground of Shipley parents, Princeton lawnparties. Sometimes I like to pretend I go to different schools. My friend from summer invited me to come to a Lupe Fiasco concert at one of the eating clubs there. I checked my BMC social calender and once I rescheduled "napping" and "staring at wall" I was able to free up the time. I've been told these things are usually drunken sloppy messes. And don't get me wrong, they were. But once you stepped into a yard filled with hundreds of sweaty, smelly college students, all wearing various shades of orange and pink, then crank the temperature up to 90+, even the thought of alcohol makes you ill. Just when you're reconsidering the thought, imagine the girl next to you, errr, showing you the after effects of drinking in this climate. So I was happy to enjoy the concert perfectly sober. Both Lupe Fiasco and his warm up act Matt Nathanson put on great shows. Really a lot of fun. Also, lots of special summer guests made appearances including my friend Ryan's mom, the red headed guy who loves to sing karaoke, but never smiles while doing it (this may only be hilarious to me...) and the icing on the cake, my old co-worker, who was, for lack of better word, a failure. We shared a few seconds of awkward eye contact and then I caught the girl he was with giving me the evil eye for the rest of the day. So now I'm trying to figure out what he told her about me...oh the possibilities! 

Spent last night at home. A tree fell in the yard. That was exciting. Luckily it missed the hammock. I don't know what I would have done without that hammock.