The basics of "Documentary Wednesday" is someone picks a documentary to watch. They then give a speech pre-viewing that describes their favorite aspects of the movie. We then view, and mock, a documentary.
This weeks choice was Grizzly Man. Let's just say it was epic enough to inspire my and Nicky's Halloween costume. What do you need to know about Grizzly Man? Timothy Treadwell lives amongst grizzly bears for 13 years. Eventually one snaps and kills him. Friends and acquaintances then recount the man and his mission, mixed with footage that he filmed. Did I mention it was narrated by Werner Herzog? That's key to the hilarity. I now present our new weekly feature....live blog of Grizzly Man...although not live this time.
Documentary Night
10:00-I get a text, it's documentary night
10:10-Ari and Drew arrive...we don't take kindly to late arrivals
10:13-Paige gives her speech, did you know that Wernor Hertzog was kicked out of school at the age of 12 for refusing to sing
10:15-Any suggestions for next weeks documentary night? Ari and I get into a shouting match about whether to watch Hoop Dreams or The Eleventh Hour. Paige decides that we will discuss this later.
10:16- Here we go. This man is cracking us up before he even opens his mouth
10:18-Footage of a bear sitting too close to the camera. This footage is making me ill
10:19-They can kill, they can bite, they can decapitate
10:20-He's a big bear, he's a big bear, HE'S A BIG BEAR! Apparently this makes this man "good with children"
10:22-a "close friend" describes the day he found out Timmy died. It is very obvious he is reading from cue cards
10:24-The internet is out. I can't check phillies scores
10:24-Drew-"3-1 in the bottom of the 5th" He's brought a portable AM/FM radio. He immediately skyrockets to the top of my "favorite boyfriends of friends" list
10:25-Description of a bear eating Grizzly Man...unnecessary.
10:30-The helicopter pilot is by far my favorite character
10:31-Ari-"If I'm ever killed at the hands of an animal, you are all charged with finding that animal and killing it as brutally as possible"
10:32-Helicopter Pilot "He got what he was asking for" he then goes on to offend every variety of person. He's still my favorite
10:35-Wait a minute! The ecologists have become my favorite characters. A hippie dippie woman and a man in a respectable suit sit perfectly still staring at a camera.
10:37-A fox makes an appearance. This isn't Fox-Man, it's Grizzly Man dammit
10:38-Ari suggests that John McCain is against grizzly bears
10:38-Tim introduces us to "Mr. Chocolate"
10:40-The fox steals a hat. Tim flips out. That's putting it lightly
10:42-The currator of the museum clearly does not want to be interviewed. Declares that Tim disrespected the bear.
10:44-The coroner gives Timothy's watch to a member of the "grizzly people". The watch is still running. The woman is clearly still in love with Timothy.
10:49-Uh, something about nearly setting a restaurant on fire
10:52-Tim debates whether or not to wear a bandana
10:55-BANJO IS MISSING!
10:56-"I can't understand why girls don't want to be with me. I have a very good personality. And I'm very good in the...err...well" Continues to offend every gay man ever.
11:00-Tim spent time with women that will "here remain anonymous"
11:03-And the coroner is back to make a strong case to take over the "favorite character" spot
11:05-And it's official, he's my favorite
11:07-Werner Hertzog: Psychiatrist
11:10-Thing I learned today? Bears poo when they fight.
11:16-According to his father, Timothy was the second choice for the role of the bartender on Cheers.
11:17-Friend discusses Timmy's forehead.
11:22-We've entered the point where he's so insane it's tragic. We're laughing...but it's the kind of laughing that makes you feel like a bad person
11:28-More offensive statements. This time directed towards religion
11:38-Megan realizes that this movie fits her thesis perfectly. Welcome to the life of a BMC senior. Phillies are one inning away from a win
11:45-Tim offends fat people
11:50-New favorite phrase "overwhelming indifference of nature"
11:54-Megan, who has been mostly silent throughout the movie, breaks into hysterical laughter and deems it the "BEST MOVIE EVER!"
11:58-Back to arguing about next weeks feature. I've thrown up the idea of Alone in the Wilderness. Also shot down.
12:00-It's been decided. Next week we will watch Spellbound.
See below for entry number two. I'm going to go beat myself up for being a nerd that blogs twice in the span of 3 hours.
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4 comments:
Your post just says that the bear killed Timothy Treadwell. Actually, Timothy Treadwell and his girlfriend were lunch for the bear and some of its bear friends that day.
Sorry, I now see that you did mention it in passing at 10:25.
haha I like your comments about me- totally great blog by the way. I had forgotten how truly great that movie watching experience was.
jewel you must never listen to this tape. destroy it.
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