10:00-The freshman is presenting tonight. She's terrified. We're all excited about the fact that we've terrified a freshman.
10:01-Paige announces that she's bringing a friend to May Day. We are outraged. Paige wants us to agree to be nice to her friend. None of us can bring ourselves to agree to that. We're very angry that Paige is going to ruin the sisterhood
10:04-Ari is late and is outraged that she doesn't have a chair. We're amazed that she thought she could be this late and still get a chair. Drew is not with her, apparently he's "trying to find the vending machine". We asked Ari if she told him where the vending machine is. She feels that "he's a smart boy, he can figure it out". For the record, our vending machine is in a closet off of a closet.
10:08- Paige claims she "has a music box with our name on it if we're not nice to her friend". Megan asks me to call public safety as she is now afraid to sit next to Paige.
10:09-Oh look, Drew decided to join us! Not a good idea to show up 10 minutes late a week after he doesn't show at all. He's not making a good case for his Doc Night standing.
10:10-Mary gives her speech. She is a kissass. I call her a brownnoser and Mary looks sad. Paige screams out that "THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT YOU CAN'T DO WITH MY FRIEND". Mary apparently had an existential crisis while watching this film.
10:12-Excellent speech.
10:13-KATELYN! THE LIGHTS!
10:13-We will be watching "Word Wars" a study of competitive Scrabble.
10:14-Oh wow, I'm already fascinated watching them make Scrabble boards
10:15-The graphics in this movie leave something to be desired. Paige thinks this is the work of the same person who made "My Stepfather Made Me Do It"
10:16-A "bingo" is a word using all 7 letters
10:19-Matt Graham shows up wearing a ripped dirty shirt, carrying a gallon of water and headphones. He also takes about a thousand pills and supplements. He concerns me.
10:21-Favorite character? "GI" Joel. Apparently the GI is not referring to the soldier but rather his GI tract.
10:23-Marlon comes from inner city Baltimore and is perfectly happy living off of money made on the competitive Scrabble circuit. Because of this life choice, people in his neighborhood judge him.
10:25-And we meet the number one player in the world. He practices Tai Chi and has a giant smiley face on his door. He also likes to talk about his "energy".
10:28-Apparently Marlon made himself an honorary Ghanan.
10:30-Mary (the freshman) is apparently playing Scrabble on her computer as we speak.
10:35-Women apparently don't do well in competitive Scrabble. One woman claims it's because they "just don't care".
10:36-Andrea is an ass and her mother's a whore
10:38-GI Joel also loves the piano
10:41-Uh oh, Matt does stand up
10:43-Andrea tried to dictate what i put on the blog. Remember what I said about her mother earlier? Still true. No one tells me what to blog about. Megan is angry that we're yelling when her favorite character (Marlon) is talking
10:45-"Aunt" Lorraine just showed up and she's kinda creepy.
10:46-Marlon says he has to stop smoking up at tournaments. He's currently giving an interview after smoking up. He thinks he's pretty damn funny
10:48-"The only study time I get is while I'm driving". Oh jeez
10:49-"Blowing up is too good for this planet. It needs to suffer, suffer, suffer. I want to be the one causing the suffering". WHOA!
10:51-Someone used "AWOL". We think that's an illegal move but no one calls him on it
10:52-The Scrabble lecture circuit is hilarious
10:53-Marlon is less than pleased with the lecture and instead heads out to go smoke up. He thinks if he had smoked up before his game he would have won it. Debatable.
10:54-Aw GI Joel, adorable little man
10:57-Ahahahaha, the discussion of what is appropriate and what the definitions should be. Apparently Trup is an appropriate word and it is defined as having sex with a sheep. Jew is also allowed but not as a noun, as a verb. Think about it.
10:59-A principal is excited because she's "bringing in a Scrabble expert to talk to the school children. The expert? Marlon. Fabulous
11:00-The question and answer session is incredible. These 8 year olds are asking the most intense questions. "Have you ever lost a game and then done something bad to yourself or others?"
11:01-The camera man just woke Marlon up because he was late. I claim the number one rule of documentaries is "don't interact with your subject". Everyone else claims that is false. I'm standing by it, this is no longer reality.
11:03-The winner of the tournament just got a little too close for comfort with the old lady handing out the awards.
11:04-GI Joel has a hat that says....GI Joel
11:07-Marlon and Matt took a train cross country because they're too afraid to fly
11:08-Things we've learned about Scrabble players? They know the words, but have no idea how to use them. Listening to them put together sentences is painful at times
11:08-The NSA (National Scrabble Association) is clamping down on unacceptable behavior such as intimidating your opponent. Marlon is pissed
11:11-We cannot for the life of us figure out the relationship between Marlon and Matt. We decide on "Frenemies"
11:13-Joe has plummeted to 73rd place. Marlon decides to go to Tiajuana for the night
11:14-We just watched Marlon hire a prostitute. In Tijuana.
11:16-Awkward urinal high fiving
11:17-Joe blames his poor performance on the fact that he didn't get acupuncture before the tournament.
11:18-Ooo, a child is on the scene. He is skeptical of becoming a professional player. He never wants it to come to the point where he "doesn't have a job". Good. Let's see how long we can hold him off.
11:18-Matt and Marlon are having a fight. Perhaps they are no longer "frenemies". Joe is having a bad day. He's lost a couple games and the cafeteria is out of turkey sandwich
11:19-Marlon announces that he doesn't consider Matt a friend. His statement is invalidated by the fact that the image on the screen is of him shaving Matts neck.
11:19-Matt is wearing a shirt that asks if we've "hugged a nurse today". Paige can't handle it anymore. She's in full blown hysteria.
11:20-Mat had a massive mental blockage and lost his final 8 games.
11:21-Marlon is going against GI Joel for a lot of money. One of their words is Grog! We're all excited about that one
11:22-Marlon has a rack with 5 vowels. He exchanges them. And comes out with more vowels. Meanwhile his time is wasting away. Paige is again in hysterics. I should mention that her thesis is due tomorrow and she is absolutely delirious at this point. Unfortunately the filmmaker notes that it is now 4:20 in the afternoon. We all know what that means. He claims he could see the money walking away and waving goodbye as it left. We were all secretly hoping for Marlon to win.
11:24-Joel goes into one of the final matches against Nigel wearing a shirt that says "I have beaten Nigel before" He loves the custom t-shirts
11:28-GI JOEL WON! WE'RE ALL EXCITED! Except Paige who quietly says that she was rooting for Nigel.
11:29-Across the Universe (the song he likes to play on the piano) plays as everyone in the arena stands up to applaud Joel. Ari ruins the moment by claiming he reminds her of a child molester.
11:30-We meet Joel's dad, they're exactly alike. Marlon comes running in to hug Joel. Joel seems concerned and uncomfortable.
11:31-Marlon announces that he's retiring from competitive Scrabble. The "where are they now" update proves that he did not.
11:32-Matt apparently scored 431 points in 93 seconds.
11:32-Joe is doing nothing
11:33-Joel is now singing in Piano bars and enjoying his celebrity. He went on the Today Show! But they didn't let him in the studio, he was interviewed on the plaza.
11:35-Excellent movie. Between this and Stephanies movie the other week we feel that Doc Night will be in good hands next year.
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment