Doc Night: In Which Werner Returns to Our Lives

10:05-Drew will be presenting tonight. Paige is unfortunately in Boston tonight at a job interview, so she has requested an in-depth blog tonight to catch her up. I shall do my best.

10:06-Drew ditched us at dinner tonight (full disclosure, I also ditched the group, but that's a side note) anyway, we're fuming.

10:07-Drew's speech: Is there such thing as insanity in penguins? Now, we'll find out.

10:08-Nicky claims that the guy from "Grounded For Life" is her father. How is this relevant? I'm not sure.

10:09-Apparently we'll be watching "Encounters at the End of the World" a Werner Herzog original about penguins.

10:10-Drew screwed up and can't get the dvd to work

10:11-Oh Werner, it's so good to hear your voice again

10:13-Here's what I've got so far, Werner is going to Antarctica on a military plane. He does not know how he got on the plane, I'm not sure if this is a metaphor or if he is actually confused as to how he got on the plane.

10:14-Werner doesn't want to make a documentary about penguins. He wants....god knows what but there is now a cartoon of a gorilla riding a donkey off into the sunset on the screen right now.

10:15-They are discussing a documentary about a boat that was frozen into the water of Antarctica. I'm more interested in all of the puppies that were on the boat. Nicky, who has apparently seen the documentary, informs me that all of those puppies were eaten.

10:16-Our first subject used to work with Mayans. Apparently when he first arrived in the Mayan community he was accused of wanting to steal children. The man feels the need to clarify that he was not there to steal children.

10:18-Ari is laughing about someone getting killed by a machete. In typical Werner fashion, this woman was not killed by a machete in Antarctica, but somewhere completely unrelated.

10:20-Our next subject has the tagline "Philosopher, tractor driver"

10:25-"This iceberg is bigger than the one that took downt he titanic. It's bigger than the country that BUILT the Titanic" A lot of things are bigger than Northern Ireland.

10:28-I'm starting to think Drew lied and that this isn't about penguins....

10:29-Apparently people at the Antarctic base camp freak out when the ice cream machine goes down. I would think ice cream would be the last thing they want.

10:32-Everyone at the base camp has to go through survival school before being allowed to leave the camp. To simulate white outs they put buckets over their head.  While I recognize the point of this exercise, it's hilarious. They hold onto a rope and try to find their instructor. The man at the front of the line screws up and thus they all screw up. Failure is always hilarious.

10:36-Werner is angry that the weather is so nice. He is only happy when it is storming. 

10:39-Werner pronounces laboratory "La-Bore-A-Tory". Cracks me up every time. Even though that is probably the way it is supposed to be pronounced.

10:42-We're discussing whether or not everyone at the camp is hooking up with each other. They have to be? Right?

10:43-People are lying on the ground listening for seals. Werner seems to think that this scene needs to last for 5 straight minutes

10:45-Man with funny fingers. Werner is fascinated. I really wish I could see life the way Werner sees it 24/7

10:47-"Sam P is the head of the dive team....we found him in a pensive mood". Aw, this is his last Antarctic dive. He's sad

10:49-Werner's take on Sam's talk? "Man only came to land to escape the horrors of the sea"

10:50-Nicky could have used her biology degree to become an under-ice diver. Instead she just studies aphids.

10:51-That being said under-ice diving is terrifying. HOLY MOLY crazy things live under the ice.

10:54-Sam likes to show doomsday scientific movies to his workers. Great. Great motivational tool

10:58-They drilled a huge hole in the ice and now they're going to blow it up. WHOA! THAT WAS AWESOME!. Not sure why they did it, but it was awesome.

10:59-Werner compares the divers to "priests preparing for mass"

11:00-Ah, that's why they blew up the hole, to create a diving area.

11:05-Complicated science stuff that I don't understand but I'm sure Nicky does

11:06-The scientists begin rehearsing for a "late night outdoor concert"

11:07-Nicky deems their performance "good, not great" which is quickly becoming our group motto.

11:08-It is 1am at the base and you would think it was 3 in the afternoon it's that bright out.

11:09-The smokers keep smoking near the door and it smells terrible in here

11:10-Werner cuts off one of his subjects with a voiceover that begins "To make a long story short....". Classic Werner. 

11:11-Wow, Antarctica has dorms. I thought everyone was living in tents.

11:13-I don't know how we got here, but someone is performing her famous "Travel as hand luggage act" in which she stuffs herself in a suitcase. 

11:15-In further "crazy things in bags" news, this one man is able to keep a inflatable boat in his  backpack. Now THAT is economy packing.

11:18-Apparently Jamaica has a stake in Antarctica. You get one bobsled team and you're suddenly a cold weather country.

11:19-Now we're talking to a guy who apparently pogo sticked to Antarctica? 

11:20-Finally, penguins

11:21-The penguin expert does not like human contact. Werner struggles to keep the conversation going. His best effort? "I hear there are gay penguins, can you talk about them?" Werner and I both have the same awkward response when struggling to keep conversation going.

11:22-The penguin expert prefers to talk about penguin prostitution.

11:24-Suicidal penguin. Werner asks "but why?". God I love this man

11:25-Apparently penguins get disoriented and instead of heading towards the feeding ground they head in the opposite direction and starve to death. We're all upset, except Nicky who says "Hey! It's natural selection! Let'em go!"

11:26-Now we're on a volcano. The volcanologist informs us that if the volcano errupts then you should keep your eye on the lava at all times. Do not run.

11:27-The cameras that they use to film the volcano were originally developed to track prison riots. 

11:28-Into the volcano. Damn. That's impressive.

11:32-Werner's a downer

11:41-HOT AIR BALLOON! Katelyn: And he just got my attention back. Sums up my thoughts exactly

11:42-Whoops, helium balloon, not hot air balloon. My mistake

11:48-Very relaxing movie. Classic Werner at times. Thumbs up.